Sister Margaret Naber
1938-2009

Sister Margaret Naber was the possessor of many talents. At her wake service, Sister Frances Nadolny, Sister Margaret’s Chapter Prioress said, “Sister Marge wrote poetry which people have read often or put to music.” Sister Mary Alice Naour opened Sister Margaret’s funeral by singing “Beside Me,” a poem that Sister Margaret wrote and for which Sister Magdalena Ezoe wrote the music.

REFRAIN:
Stand beside me and share my peace.
Stand beside me and help my pain.

1. Don’t be in front of me and lead the way,
   Don’t be beyond and push me where I may not want to go.
2. Don’t lift me to an end and leave me there.
   Don’t carry me to where I may not want to go.
3. In a deeper lasting way, don’t hurry me.
   It is hard to stand beside me, but I need you there.

Sister Margaret was the older of two daughters born to John Clemens and Mary Edith (Peck) Naber, and was of Irish and German ancestry. She was born on April 16, 1938, in De Kalb, Illinois, and followed by her sister Patricia.

John Naber was a mechanic, and provided well for his family. He was originally from Malta, Illinois, and his wife was from Waterford, Wisconsin. Records do not show how they met, but after their marriage they made their home in Illinois, at first in De Kalb and later in St. Charles, where they were active members of St. Patrick Parish.

The Naber daughters attended St. Patrick Elementary School in St. Charles, and finished high school at Mount St. Mary Academy. At both schools they were taught by the Adrian Dominican Sisters. Margaret graduated in June 1956. When she told her parents that she wanted to become a Dominican Sister, they did not stand in her way.

On June 26 of that year she was in Adrian, where she entered the postulate. With her group, she received the habit and her religious name (Sister Clement Mary) on December 27, and professed her first vows on December 28, 1957. For the balance of that school year, she studied at Siena Heights College (now University).

In the fall of 1958 she was sent to St. Paul in Grosse Pointe, Michigan, where she spent four years and taught second, third, and fourth grade students. She was then for six years at Our Lady of Mount Carmel in Wickliffe, Ohio, as a second grade teacher. As a result of summer study, in July 1964 Siena Heights College awarded her a bachelor’s degree with a major in home economics and minors in English and science. In 1968 she returned to Michigan for four years as a first grade teacher at St. Clement in Romeo. Again as a result of summer study, she earned a master’s degree from Michigan State University in Lansing with a major in family life.

In 1972 she began her service to the developmentally disabled. For a year she served as executive director at Haven Farm for the Retarded in Romeo, serving thirty-nine persons, both children and adults, who were born with mental retardation. She then ministered at the Parents Foundation in Romeo for two years. At the wake, Sister Patricia McDonald said:

She wanted a better life for these individuals and did not want them to live in an institutional setting where their individual growth and development was minimal. She wanted age appropriate settings which would and could enhance personal dignity for all.

The year 1975 saw the beginning of her thirteen-year service as executive director at Residential Systems, Inc., an organization that operates residential homes for the developmentally disabled. During this time she opened twelve group homes for them in Macomb County. At the wake, Sister Patricia said:

Sister Marge then assumed the presidency of Residential Systems which worked primarily in the design and implementation of the least restrictive environment for disabled persons. Hence, Macomb and Oakland Counties served as a national model for the creation of group homes and their program and planning. The awesome dedication of this one woman helped create a network of positive change for others.

In 1980 Residential Systems presented its Distinguished Service Award to the Adrian Dominicans in honor of Sister Margaret Naber “for meritorious services to the developmentally disabled of Michigan and for her dedication and devotion to her ministry, the community, and the nation.”

In the early 1980s Sister Margaret was diagnosed with lupus, and became actively involved in the Michigan Lupus Foundation. In 1981 she became a certified social worker.

She was elected Prioress of Nokomis Mission Chapter in 1988 with her office in Utica, Michigan. On her annals form for 1990-91 she wrote, “I rode my bike seventy-five miles for the American Lung Association.”

She, however, was able to serve as Chapter Prioress not quite four years of the six-year term. She suffered a stroke in October 1991 at age fifty-three that left her with physical disabilities and a diagnosis of aphasia, the loss of the ability to articulate ideas. An article in the Michigan Catholic of August 7, 1992, described what happened:

Sister Margaret Naber, OP, was an avid bicyclist who rode to raise funds for multiple sclerosis, lung disorders, and lupus. The Utica resident now logs miles on her stationary bike as she works to regain strength and mobility following her stroke.

She was rushed to St. Joseph’s Mercy-West in Clinton Township. For the next seven weeks therapists, physiatrists, other members of the health care team, and her many close friends stood beside her as she progressed through the intensive inpatient rehabilitation program at St. Joseph’s. Initially, Sister Marge was unable to communicate and couldn’t move her right leg or arm. . . . While she still has difficulty verbalizing her thoughts, Sister Marge quickly regained her abilities to read and spell. . . .

While on the inpatient unit, Sister Marge’s strong love, tenderness, and concern for others made her a favorite with staff and patients. In the homelike setting of the rehab unit, she would wheel herself from room to room each evening to say goodnight to her extended family.

The day after she was discharged from the inpatient unit, Sister Marge began additional speech, occupational, and physical therapy at St. Joseph’s Mercy-East in downtown Mount Clemens. She continues to improve with hard work at home. The pain she experiences during workouts is good, she says, because it means she’s still feeling. She is now able to walk with a little help from a cane and has regained some mobility in her right arm.

Sister Frances said:

In the first months of her recovery, Sister Marge received physical therapy and language therapy—two supports that would serve her well. So that she could live at home, Sisters Bernice Olszewski, Pat McDonald, and Peg O’Flynn were trained in appropriate therapies and interventions. For years, they have been faithful supports to her, as she has been to them.

In the Health Section of the Macomb Daily for May 11, 1999, is an article on strokes, and Sister Margaret is mentioned.

Sister Marge Naber, an Adrian Dominican nun, experienced no warning signs leading to the 1991 stroke that left her partially paralyzed and communication impaired.

Unable to return to her former position, Sister Marge of Utica keeps busy painting pottery and creating floral arrangements using one hand, volunteering at the hospital, and working at the Peaceful Dove bookstore in Shelby Township. Her motto? “Try again, try again, I try again.”

Sister Bernice also spoke of Sister Marge’s creativity. “Her need to create led her down the street to take a course in floral design using one hand. But, as she said, not to do corsages. ‘I can’t. One hand.’”

During the almost eighteen years of her disability, Sister Marge served on two boards: the Creative Employment Board and the Guardianship Board for Developmentally Disabled Adults. She was active in an Aphasia Support Group, a Stroke Survivor’s Group, participated in the research program for aphasia at Wayne State University, attended the Nokomis Chapter assemblies, and was active in her Mission Group. In August 2002 she was able to attend the Congregational Gathering.

Her participation in speech therapy enabled her to speak at Masses on behalf of various collections, to be a presenter at Aphasia seminars, and in 1999 to introduce Actress Patricia Neal, also a stroke survivor, the keynote speaker for Opening Doors Seminar of the University of Michigan Communicative Disorders Clinic.

Even in her misfortune, Sister Margaret was concerned about the common good of the women in her Chapter. She learned to use the computer, and used it to communicate with the sisters, sending out hundreds of cards and computer notes and making hundreds of phone calls. Sister Bernice said:

She spent hours at the computer picking, choosing, creating, typing messages for the sisters. Even on the morning she passed to eternity, she had been working at the computer on her messages.

She had me do two mailings from the weekend. After she passed away on Wednesday, we found a whole stack of “stuff” that she had ready for mailing. It represented hours of work sitting at the table writing, and deeper notches in the index finger of her left hand where she held the pencil. We mailed those greetings after Marge passed away.

Sister Margaret focused on living one day, one hour, one minute at a time. When death came to her unexpectedly on March 4, 2009, it came six weeks before her seventy-first birthday.

Her wake-remembrance service was held in Holy Rosary Chapel on March 6. Present were her mother, her sister Patricia and husband Gerry, nieces, nephews, many other family members, and her many Dominican friends. Sister Frances Nadolny, Prioress of Great Lakes Dominican Mission Chapter, welcomed those attending, and summarized Sister Margaret’s life and ministry. She suggested a “mantra” for Sister Margaret’s life: canes, cards, and calls—canes for support, cards for friendship, calls for communicating.

Sister Bernice Olszewski remembered:

When Sister Marge was elected Chapter Prioress, our story together began. We both served on the leadership team and became very good friends. . . . When she experienced her stroke in 1991 I was on sabbatical and that freed me to assist her in any way that I could. Sisters Pat McDonald, Peg O’Flynn, and I worked out a plan so that one of the three of us could be present to her around the clock.

Sister Patricia McDonald said in part:

Sister Marge left us as we knew her in the physical sense, but her gifts and spirit continue to be present as we go about doing the good works she taught so many. Let us continue to appreciate this great Dominican preacher of Adrian . . . a valiant woman who lived for others one day at a time.

Sister Marge’s funeral liturgy took place on March 7 in Holy Rosary Chapel. Father Roland Calvert, OSFS, was the presider and homilist. Father said in part:

One of the phrases often used to describe Jesus is that he was a Person for Others. The Lord himself once said, “I have come to serve, not to be served.” That phrase, Person for Others, is a good one to summarize the life of Sister Margaret Naber.

All who have spoken of Sister Marge have emphasized her lively and outgoing spirit, her great optimism, and her strength. She made several visits to the Motherhouse in the last few years and I had the opportunity to chat with her. Even at the first meeting, those qualities were very evident.

Among his closing comments Father said, “We praise God this day for the life of Sister Margaret and for the many lives she touched with her love.” Those who knew and loved her agree.